Session Five: Week 2

Tuesday

Last session’s ensemble suggested that we watch the Shakespeare Behind Bars documentary very early in this session, so that’s what we did tonight. This is at least the tenth time I’ve seen the film, and it never fails to move and inspire me. This proved to be true for our ensemble as well.

The past four times I’ve viewed the film with an SIP ensemble (membership has varied since 2012), the focus of our discussion afterward has been predominantly about the group’s mechanics – how they retain members, how often they meet, the differences between working with men and women, the willingness of the men in the film to go all out for their roles. But tonight’s discussion was very different.

When the film was over, I asked the group if anyone would like to share her thoughts. The first response was from a returning member who said, “Well, that’s never easy to watch.” When we asked her why, she responded, “Because… I’m a criminal. It’s just not easy to watch.” She said that people think things about her because of her offense, but they don’t know the whole story.

Another woman said, “Until I got in trouble and came to prison, I used to say things, too. Now I’ve learned that everything is not black and white.” We talked about how the way we judge and are judged is often based on very little information – we make assumptions based on the little we know and run with them. “I’m afraid of how I’m perceived by other people,” said one woman.

“It’s beautiful to see how the men have so much fun with this program,” said another woman. “There are so few opportunities for true rehabilitation in prison. This is one. They found something to fulfill their lives – even the ones serving life sentences. It was beautiful.”

One woman shared how impressed she was by the level of empathy and support the men had for each other. Several of the men in the film share what their offenses were, and she asked if the entire group knew about one crime in particular. I responded (having heard this information from Curt Tofteland) that they did. “Wow,” she said. That crime resonated for her due to her own experience, and she talked about how conflicted she felt that, on the one hand, everyone has the right to seek to do better – to attain some sort of redemption, as the man in the film says – but she doesn’t know if she personally could see past the crime and have empathy for him, no matter how much she wants to.

Another woman brought up how interesting it was to see Red learn about himself and his life through playing Miranda. We talked about how this is one of the key reasons that we work with Shakespeare, and that it is likely to happen for a number (if not all) of us as well.

The discussion was open, honest, and emotional. Several of the women shed tears as we talked. It was an honor to be a part of such a frank conversation about issues that can be difficult to articulate, let alone to openly discuss in a very new group setting. We have had such discussions before in SIP, but it has always taken much longer for the ensemble to be so open to each other. It makes me even more excited to continue the process with this ensemble.

Friday

Tonight during check-in, we discussed the challenge of people needing to leave early fairly often to go to work or to take medication. We decided that we’ll switch up the format of our meetings to accommodate that as best we can – sometimes we’ll begin with games and end with Shakespeare, and sometimes we’ll do the opposite. Since last Friday was games-first, we began tonight with Shakespeare and had such interesting conversation about it that we never got to the games!

We continued our text work by reading Act I Scene II aloud. “I’d be pissed if I were Brabantio,” said one woman. We talked about this father’s unwillingness to see his daughter’s culpability in her “crime” – she’s gone, so it must be that Othello put spells on her. We also discussed how very much in control Othello is in this scene, and what an important person he obviously is – everyone is looking for him and everyone except Brabantio treats him with a lot of respect. We also talked about the class issue at play here – Othello and Desdemona are not in the same class, regardless of their skin colors, and this seems to be very important.

Since this scene doesn’t really resolve anything – it leads into the following one – we continued reading so we could see how things play out. It’s a long scene, and we stopped every now and then to make sure everyone was keeping up and that we understood what was going on.

One of our takeaways was that, although Othello says he speaks roughly, his language is quite evocative and compelling. He gets his meaning across. We also paid attention to the fact that Brabantio gives essentially the same speech four times, hammering home the point that the only way Desdemona could have done this is if Othello literally enchanted her, but the moment she states that she was a willing participant and loves Othello, he seems to completely deflate. “This breaks him. He’s broken now,” said one woman. His anger is gone, and he expresses hurt and disappointment.

Beyond his parental dismay at Desdemona going behind his back, the ensemble brought up the idea that this loss of control injures Brabantio’s reputation as a senator. “What do your actions say about me?” Several of us have had personal experiences that make us relate to this. One woman also volunteered that the “wealthy, curléd darlings,” – the suitors whom he wanted her to marry – would have enhanced his status and reputation, but the marriage to Othello does not.

This led Kyle to mention the “lace curtains” metaphor – a house may look beautiful from the outside, with lace curtains, but if the occupants have spent all of their money on those curtains, the inside is likely a mess. I remarked that the metaphor can work two ways. “Yeah,” said one woman ruefully, remarking that part of her family will have nothing to do with her because she’s in prison – they’ve written her off because of that label. “But that’s the thing about lace curtains,” said another woman, “If you get close enough, you can see through ‘em.” This, too, works two ways.

There was a strong reaction to Desdemona’s assertion of her love for Othello and desire to go to war with him. “I wish I could feel that way about a man at some point in my life,” said one woman. Her sentiments for her husband are truly beautiful. We talked about how, despite him being an admittedly hard man, Desdemona’s empathy for Othello and his struggles softened him emotionally toward her. There’s so much set up here for what follows.

We then branched off into a discussion of the term “Moor” – both its denotation and connotations. We are working toward viewing this play both through our own experiences and with the knowledge that Elizabethans had a very different worldview and use of language. It’s a difficult balance to strike. We noted that sometimes when people refer to Othello as “the Moor,” they are being obviously disrespectful, but sometimes they are not, as when Desdemona says, “… I do love the Moor…” We know she thinks the world of him. “Hey, you can say ‘white girl’ and have it be either a good thing or a bad thing,” one woman pointed out. We talked about what Othello might look like, and how much it matters – not exactly what shade his skin is, but the fact that he’s different and foreign – he’s not really part of this society and can never hope to blend in.

A few of the women seemed uncomfortable with the amount of time we spent talking about this, but others pointed out that, since it’s a theme in the play, we need to spend time on it. We don’t want to get bogged down, since it’s not the focus of the play, but we do need to continue to be able to have the open, respectful kinds of conversations we had tonight. 

Session Five: Week 1

Tuesday

Tonight was our first official meeting of the fifth session of Shakespeare in Prison, and the group was enthusiastic and happy to be there – and that definitely includes us facilitators!

After warming up and introducing ourselves, playing a favorite theatre game that leads into some gentle name memorization, we sat down in a circle to come up with this year’s expectations for ourselves and our group. Last year’s ensemble felt that this would be an important step to enhance early ensemble bonding, meshing between old and new members, and increasing the level of commitment among ensemble members.

The ensuing discussion was upbeat and constructive, outlining what we hope to accomplish and how we think we can go about doing it. The discussion lasted longer than I thought it would, and that was a good thing since so many of the women had the opportunity to volunteer their ideas, get feedback, and listen to others. While some were understandably quiet, others were outspoken and welcoming, and it seems that we are all on the same page.

What it seems to boil down to for this ensemble is the guiding principle that “we are adults who value open, clear, respectful communication.” Whatever we discussed came right back to that. If we can stay focused on that, we should do well in creating the safe, open, supportive environment that we desire, even when the going gets rough.

We all left happy to be together again and with great anticipation for our next meeting.

Friday

After tonight’s warm up and check-in, Kyle led the ensemble in a new exercise called “King of the Jungle.” We spend a lot of time in our first few months on games and exercises as we get to know each other and form our ensemble, and this game is bound to be a favorite from now on. The ensemble showed great willingness to commit to the silliness of the game, getting into its friendly competitive nature as well. It’s a great exercise in quick thinking, improvisation, and other skills that we seek to develop in our group.

We then sat in a circle to begin delving into Othello. We read through Act I Scene I, stopping every now and then to be sure that everyone was on the same page about what was happening in the scene. We discussed the atmosphere of the scene – how our play begins, how we see it in our heads – and we began to discuss the characters as well. One of our seasoned ensemble members reminded us not to judge anyone (including Iago) too quickly – it’s likely that our ideas will evolve as we work through the play, and we’re not doing ourselves any favors if we assume things right off the bat.

We got the scene on its feet to see how it works that way. For one of the women, it was her first time being on stage in this way, and we all gave her a round of applause for her bravery in stepping up on her second day in the group! The reading led us to discuss various ways of staging the scene, including how we might use some of the scenery in storage from past sessions. Three other women then led a reading of the scene on its feet, and this time we also brought in some others as Brabantio’s servants. The different readings were enlightening and exciting. Already, we’re talking about how the more people commit, the better things work.

We lifted our ring back up with smiles, taking until the very last minute that we could. It’s only the first week of the program, but already we are all so excited about the possibilities of this year. No doubt there will be challenges, but we’re off to a great start.

Session Four: Weeks 39 and 40

The ensemble arrived for the final performance relaxed and completely ready to bring the process to a close. They were confident and steady, even when we became crunched for time; no one panicked because they have proved how well they work as a team to overcome such challenges. We also worked efficiently as a team to pack up all of our materials at the end and agreed to reflect in depth on the process at our wrap up meeting the next week. When Kyle and I walked into the auditorium, several women were seated around a table, ready to begin discussion. One was standing on the stage, and when she saw us, she exclaimed, “I’m sad!” She is not looking forward to taking a break this summer, but those of us who’ve been doing this for awhile assured her that taking time to rest and let our energy build back up works better than not.

While everyone said again how much they enjoyed the performances and what great feedback they’ve gotten around the prison, they were much more eager to have a constructive discussion about the program in general: what’s working well, and where we need to improve. This was a lengthy conversation, and here are a couple of highlights that particularly illustrate the dedication to and ownership of the program that this ensemble has developed:

• Although the group is still reluctant to have a formal audition at the beginning of the session, the three-day “trial period” we introduced this fall proved problematic for several reasons. The group decided not only to prolong this phase of the program, but to put themselves “on probation” (although we are not going to call it that!) to ensure that there’s no double standard and that everyone’s in it together. We are also going to develop community expectations as a group during our first meeting so that every single person knows how she is being assessed during the trial period. With these changes, we hope that we can avoid some of the “drama” that we dealt with in the fall.
   
• We all agreed that we must at least read through the entire play, even if we don’t put every scene on its feet, before we cast it – we rushed this part of the process this year because some of us were impatient to move faster, and it hurt us. We decided to cast our play in a new way – instead of a group discussion with a “blind” vote by raised hand (which has worked in the past, but not this year), we are going to figure out who will audition for each role with “sides” (like professional callbacks), and then everyone will submit a cast list by anonymous ballot, which I will tally up.

All in all, the ensemble is satisfied with the work we’ve done this season. Most of them plan on returning in the fall, and they are going to try to work on Othello in pairs and small groups as much as possible over the summer to prepare. Those who have been in the group for two or three years feel that it is growing in a positive direction, and we are all optimistic that, while we will always face challenges together, the changes we’re making going into next year will strengthen us and allow the process to go more smoothly.

Normally, this would be the final post for the season, but stay tuned for a special post tomorrow and an exciting announcement about the program very soon.

Thank you for all of your support of Shakespeare in Prison this season!

Session Four: Week 38

First and Second Performances: Reflections… Having been a part of four plays at the prison now, I was struck somewhat by the similarities between seasons, but more so by the differences. I asked several of our “vets” how they felt. One, who was physically ill from nerves last year, commented before our opening that she felt nervous, but not sick, and she was excited to perform. She said that during that performance, she discovered that if she pretended the audience wasn’t there (“I put a wall around them”), she felt much more confident. That’s a common actor’s trick that no one had to teach her. Another woman, who struggled last year with her own perfectionism and expectations for others, said that she felt that the session had gone much better this year, and she felt more relaxed. I agreed with her that we’ve worked out many of the “kinks” we wanted to, and she said, “Well, yeah, but what I mean is that I feel better. I feel like I’ve grown a lot.”

One woman, who joined in September and has had wavering confidence this entire time, remarked to Sarah that she wouldn’t be able to go to another call out, but that, “I won’t let down my ensemble. We’ve been together since September, and we’ve all worked too hard for me to let anyone down.” Another, who had severe stage fright in September (she’d actually been goaded into joining by her room mate), said joyfully, “I want to do Shakespeare forever! When I get out, I want to do Shakespeare all the time. I need to find somewhere to do that.”

We worked together as an incredibly cohesive team to whiz through our play, having a ton of fun and clearly entertaining our audience as we went the first night. Coming into the second night, the entire group seemed more relaxed and confident – they’d done it once successfully, received overwhelmingly positive feedback from their peers, and were revved up to do it again. The show totally gelled during its second performance, as we improvised through mistakes on the fly with great ease and humor; at one point in the penultimate scene, I don’t even remember what happened, but between line flubs and our general sense of hilarity, several of the women cut the scene off, and we left the stage laughing hysterically. Our audience was laughing, too.

This is the largest ensemble yet to complete the program and probably the most cohesive. They truly take care of each other, no matter what their differences – minor tiffs evaporate for the good of the team, and they have pulled off an energetic and inspiring play. Our final performance is on June 9, followed by a wrap up session. Then we’ll be “on break” for the summer – but those of us returning to the program all acknowledge that we’ll actually be spending a lot of time preparing for Othello – we’re all just so excited to do it again.

Reflections from co-facilitators…

Lauren: Leading up to the performances was so exciting to me. These women have come so far over the past nine months. All of the actors were on edge until the show started. Forgetting lines was probably the most common fear. Once the curtain opened, everyone was so energized and on top of it. When lines were dropped, the recovery was quick and efficient, which I think gave confidence to the women. I sat in the house for the second show, and was told a number of times by audience members how awesome the performance was. One woman told me she use to study British literature, and she really loved the performance. This has been a great experience, and I'm so proud of everyone who was involved.

Dominique: These women have a firm grasp on the physical comedy of the play - the choice the group made to welcome any improve-based, physical, and slapstick big actions serve the play so well. Often Shakespeare's comedies get lost in translation - jokes that were funny 450 years ago don't always play as well now. But the physicality they gave it - and the fact that they know what the comedy is - made them able to convey it to their audience with amazing deftness. They knew what they were saying and doing and it showed, even if the audience wasn't always able to key into the language. The strong physical choices made the meaning clear and brought clarity to the language as well. And they were funny. Just plain ol’ funny - performances blossomed out of women who were mortified to speak out loud last fall. Each performance was its own miracle for its own reason - and more what the program is about than interpretation of Shakespeare. But at the root of the variety of achievements met by this group of women is the conquering of Shakespearean text in a theatrical performance done for a live audience. There is some kind of magic in that, and it is truly amazing to watch happen.

Vanessa: Opening nights are my favorite kind of days. And this was no exception. As soon as we all met up in the theatre to set up, you could feel the energy and joy for what was about to happen. I was blown away throughout the performance. The women were prepared and excited to show their work, and it was so much fun to be in the wings with them as they came on and off stage. They treated this as if they had been acting for years and made me feel like I was the newbie! Cuz I am. And I am grateful I was a part of this group. I was so proud. I cried at curtain call. It was magical. And it wasn't just luck- because they made it all happen again for the second show. The audience response was just as amazing. I think we all had moments of transcending where we were and giving in to the communal healing power of theatre. Ah. This is why we do it.

Sarah: When our ensemble arrived at the auditorium, we immediately came together to work. We set up the set, the actors dove into their costumes and make-up, we all circled up for a brief vocal warm up and in less that 20 minutes the women were ready to perform! They were more professional than most professionals. Many of the women shared that they were terrified to perform in front of their first audience and all offered each other support and encouragement. They were a wonder on stage - funny and brave and taking care of each other through every moment! I have come to expect this cast to be patient with each other and to respect each other and to share themselves with each other but to see them share their courage, humor, and patience in front of their audience too was moving betting belief! I could not be more honored that this group of women welcomes me into their midst!

Kyle: I feel like a bit of a broken record, but my reflections are right in line with what always comes to me when working in the prison: it sometimes doesn’t feel like I’m in a prison, it just feels like I am doing a show. It’s hard to describe really, but there were the same buzz and butterflies that come with the opening night of any show. The women come off the stage and ask how they think the show is going so far, how they think they did in that last scene, put hands to heads at a flubbed line or prop malfunction. Not all that dissimilar from any other show in which I have been. Having the costumes was a game changer. It is something special when someone thinks about what clothing would work just for you, or that would fit just right for your character; I really underestimated the impact of that exchange, and wouldn’t have thought it would go as far as it did to make it feel like a “real show.” I think the most important lesson for the women was to keep having fun no matter what - if the actors are having fun, then the audience is going to have fun, too. Sure, things went wrong; sure, lines were forgotten - that’s life, and that’s theatre. It contains a powerful lesson, though: no matter what goes wrong, you keep going and you keep smiling. As I said above, that goes for life and theatre. When we left, there was still light outside, and sun was setting, which was strange because most of the year we would leave in darkness. It seemed a fitting way to finish the process. I was beaming with pride for the women’s achievement and feel so grateful to have been a part of the program.

Session Four: Week 37

Tuesday

Tonight we had a dress rehearsal that was intended to be a full run of the show. While we did not get to the end of the play, we made some good discoveries along the way.

For one, there was a camera crew there (I’ll post their finished product as soon as it’s online!), which made some of the women rather nervous. Even though several members of the group (including me) reassured those affected that only brief clips would be pulled, and there was no way our “mistakes” would make it into the short film, we discussed later that simply having “outsiders” (and men in particular) at this particular rehearsal complicated things. We are very grateful that they were there to document our work; however, this is something that we may try to avoid in the future now that we know how much it can throw our focus and confidence.

I will say, though, that when the crew departed, it was with great enthusiasm for the growth they witnessed first-hand in the ensemble, having filmed our group about a month ago. This is a good lesson for us: that even when we feel we are not at our best, from an “outsider’s” perspective, our work is still exciting and inspiring. Our mistakes seem bigger to us than they do to our audience.

When we circled up at the end of the session, I asked how everyone felt. Several newer members of the group said that they did not feel good about their work and the rehearsal in general. Before I could say anything, a seasoned member of the group reassured them that a rehearsal like this is normal, and that our main issue right now is that we’re taking things too seriously and not having enough fun. Several women’s eyes lit up. I took that opportunity to remind the group that “it’s called a PLAY for a reason!” We do need to loosen up – we’re sharing a comedy, and if we don’t have fun, our audience won’t either. Our pacing is very slow – that’s why we didn’t make it to the end – and this will likely fix itself if we just relax and roll with the punches more instead of freezing when we hit a (usually line-related) wall.

We talked about a few ways in which we can “cover” our mistakes, most of which involve acknowledging that we’re off in a way that fits with the broad style of comedy we’ve chosen. The plan for Thursday is to work lines, and the plan for Friday is to do a “speed-through/fun-through” of our play – barrel through as fast as we can, relax, and have a good time.

This conversation lasted only a few minutes, but it seemed to reassure and refresh those who were feeling badly.

Thursday

Two members of our group were particularly down today, for reasons that had nothing to do with Shakespeare. They showed up anyway, willing to work but visibly upset about things going on outside of our little bubble. It should go without saying that life while incarcerated is very, very hard, and I am always grateful when members of our group attend even though they, like most of us on such days, would rather be alone and curled up in bed. Our group can often serve as a distraction on these days, which is why I encourage them to drag themselves to the auditorium, and today seemed to serve that purpose for these two.

Though our intent today was simply to work on lines, we decided to circle up, take some time to just breathe together with our eyes closed, and then transition into bringing down our ring of light. We breathed together for several minutes, and when I opened my eyes I saw a few others had also opened theirs and were sending energy up into the ring. I joined them, and so did the rest one by one. As we raised our arms to hold our ring, we saw that our co-facilitator Sarah’s eyes were still closed. Patiently, we waited for her to join us. I have no idea how long this would have lasted, except that one of the women who was so down when she came in couldn’t hold in a giggle. Sarah then opened her eyes, saw that the rest of us were waiting for her, and sheepishly raised her hands to join us. “I’m so sorry!” she said. “No,” said the woman who giggled, “That was perfect, actually.” We lowered the ring together and spread it out over the room, laughing together as we did so.

We sat around a table together, working through the second half of the play. One of the women who’s been nervous about her lines turns out to be very skillful at improvising her way through when she’s not word-perfect – we were all pretty impressed, and made sure she knew that this strategy will work if she needs to rely on it – even an audience used to seeing Shakespeare would likely not notice much “wrong” in her delivery.

We circled up prior to parting, and Sarah was gathering up materials as the rest of us moved into place. “Are you still breathing, Sarah?” joked one woman, and we all laughed. “I am never going to live that down,” said Sarah, “I am so embarrassed!”

“Don’t be,” said the same woman who giggled during Sarah’s initial moment, “I meant it when I said that was perfect. That laugh changed the day for me completely.”

Friday

The ensemble touched base during our circle and brief warm up: barrel through the play and have fun while doing it! Lean on each other! Support each other!

And barrel through, we did – right through to the end of the play. Was it a perfect run? No, but our goal is not to be perfect. We accomplished what we set out to do today: We got through the entire play, we kept our pace quick for the most part, we covered for each other on missed lines, and we had a LOT more fun together.

We didn’t have time at the end to debrief in detail, but the feeling I got from the ensemble is that, while they are still nervous, they are ready to dive into sharing our work with an audience. It will be all hands on deck Tuesday with our facilitators, so there will be lots of facilitator support with the inevitable nerves that even the most seasoned professionals sometimes get the first time an audience is present.

I look forward to updating you with details about our performances! Stay tuned!